Heather Mills will never be done complaining about how hard she has it. Even if she got every red cent Paul McCartney ever made; even if she took a poll and every single person in the world said they loved her more than they loved their own children; even if hundred dollar bills and vegan hamburger patties came out her butt on command, Heather Mills will never be done complaining about how hard she has it. Though that last hypothetical example is probably true. Moving on…

Heather still says she didn’t get nearly enough money in her divorce settlement – even though she got over $50 million.

Sir Paul McCartney’s former wife Heather Mills is still seething over the $33.6 million (£24 million) divorce settlement she received from the former Beatle.

McCartney divorced Mills in March last year (08) and the former model used a speech at a London show for vegetarian charity Viva to complain the sum she received wasn’t high enough.

Mills says, “I got five per cent of what we earned together in seven years. And we earned it together, I worked my butt off doing the tours and everything.”

Outspoken Mills, who charges up to $102,000 (£75,000) a time as an after-dinner speaker, also complained she has become unpopular: “Everyone thinks I’m nuts because I speak the truth and I’m very outspoken. The meat industry hate me, the dairy industry hate me, the Beatle industry hate me, the landmine industry. So I have a lot of enemies out there. But I also have a lot of support.”

[From the Post Chronicle]

It’s funny, I do hear a lot about Heather’s enemies… not so much about her support. I guess “a lot” is a relative term. I mean if you’re the type that thinks you got a bad deal at $50 million, you probably have a skewed view of numbers. “A lot” to Heather could easily mean six. Which, honestly, I think is a generous guess on my part.

It’s been reported that Heather has already blown through half of her divorce settlement. It’s gone to important things like a really expensive pool. Though to be fair, she did donate over $1 million worth of vegan food to a New York City food bank. If she’d stayed on the path of not being a totally soul-destroying bitch – even if she were just half a soul-destroying bitch – I could maybe… no, never mind. She’s a lost cause no matter what. Heather needs to figure out a way to market her “most hated” status somehow. Maybe if there were a job for making little children cry or throwing rocks at three-legged turtles. Something like that. But she needs to find her niche.

Here’s Heather checking into Los Angeles International Airport to catch a flight out on March 6th. Images thanks to BauerGriffinOnline.