Here is Amanda Seyfried’s spread in April’s Esquire Magazine - she’s one of their “Women We Love”. As for me, I don’t love Amanda. I don’t hate her either. I go back and forth between thinking she’s a cutie with a long career ahead of her, or she’s just a pretty moron who won’t be getting parts very much longer. I really don’t know. In LaineyGossip’s Oscar wrap-up, they mentioned that Amanda was kind a big fail at red carpet interviews. Apparently, when Ryan Seacrest asked why she was leaving Big Love, she told him “I wasn’t working as much as I wanted to, so…” So? You’re a working actress on an acclaimed show! Produced by Tom Hanks! You think she could manage to not sound so snotty?

I hate to say it, but Amanda didn’t come across very well in the short Esquire interview either. Of course, the dude writing about her was about to rub one out (seriously, read the whole piece), so maybe Amanda was creeped out:

Amanda on her diet: “”I’m on a raw-food diet,” she declares, raising her brows to make her eyes even bigger. “It’s intense. And sort of awful. Yesterday for lunch? Spinach. Just spinach. Spinach and some seeds.”

On getting her Australian shepherd puppy: “It’s so predictable. I just left him and I already want to run back and see him. Most of the time I just want to go home and throw the dog a stick. Can anything be more obvious than throwing a stick? I need to be needed. I understand that the need is never with the dog.”

On what kind of girl she is: “I would always tell somebody if they had sh-t on their face. Especially if it’s really feces. Well, I’m a BFF. I play a BFF. It’s what I do. I have an actual necklace from Jennifer’s Body that says BFF. That’s my role right there.”

On moving from Los Angeles to New York: “I sacrificed six years in L. A. I did my job out here. I made the contacts and did the work I had to do. But I came here at eighteen. I’m out of here at twenty-four, and I feel lucky it wasn’t longer.”

On photography: “I learned a long time ago that photographs are not theater. This is not acting. It’s pretending. I pretend I’m looking at a man who is looking right at me, a man who sees me as exceptionally clever and adventurous.”

[From Esquire]

Once again, could she try not to sound so snotty? “I sacrificed six years in L. A…” Really? Being a working actress in a sea of thousands of girls who would kill to have a fraction of your workload is a “sacrifice”?

The girl’s got a terrific figure though. I’ll give her that.

Amanda in Esquire, courtesy of Esquire online.

CB sent me this story yesterday, but after the E-Trade debacle (which has a new chapter that I’ll to in a moment), I was slightly Lohan-ed out. Which brings me to a conversation point: the banning of Lindsay on this site. CB and I have talked about it, and the truth is, Lindsay is still totally gossip-worthy, as evidenced by how many hits we consistently get on Lohan posts. She’s a hot mess, yes, but she’s also crazy and arrogant and delusional, and even though it might make me a bad person, I find that I enjoy writing about her shenanigans. She doesn’t have the sheer tragedy of Britney Spears - Lindsay’s downfall isn’t about some chemical imbalance or anything, Lindsay’s problem is The Cult of Entitlement, you know? No one telling her “no”, no one telling her “you can’t pull this sh-t and still have a career.” Except people did say that to Lindsay, and she was too coked up to listen.

Anyway, the first story is that Lindsay was on a UK talk show with Alan Carr, and Carr asked her a bunch of “uncomfortable questions”. Like, “Are you Arthur or you Martha now? Are you back on the c-ck?” I’ll give Lindsay credit for looking genuinely embarrassed:

Meanwhile, in Lindsay’s-only-problem-is-her-childhood-milkaholism news, Lawyers for both “sides” are speaking out. Mostly, it’s Lindsay’s sketchy lawyer doing the talking, but E-Trade did release a short statement to Esquire: “While E*TRADE doesn’t typically comment on pending litigation, we felt it appropriate given the high level of interest in the E*TRADE Baby. With the E*TRADE Baby, our advertising campaign is meant to be witty and memorable, while effectively communicating the powerful investing tools and services offered by E*TRADE. We believe the claims are without merit and we intend to defend ourselves vigorously in this case.” Lindsay’s lawyer, Stephanie Ovadia, had much more to say:

Lindsay Lohan’s case against E*Trade is heating up, with both sides trading barbs, denials and accusations over a TV ad about a “milk-a-holic” baby named Lindsay. Since being filed in New York on Monday, the lawsuit has raised more than a few eyebrows. Stephanie Ovadia, Lohan’s lawyer at the forefront of the lawsuit, tells PopEater that skeptics need to look at the “totality of the commercial, taking into account name and characterization.”

If you really want to know when E*Trade (or its ad agency, Grey Group) turned the corner and decided to model the boyfriend-stealing baby after Lohan, Ovadia asserts, all you need to do is look at the ad’s script. “This script is a very important piece,” she tells us. “Because, slowly, all of the pieces are fitting together to make one complete picture.”

That “piece” of the puzzle emerged this week via Esquire magazine, which happened to be embedded with Grey while they were crafting the baby ads. In the original script, dated Aug. 11 of last year, the “other woman/baby” character was named Deborah. In an updated draft six weeks later, the “bimbus” (which was eventually changed to “milk-a-holic”) was changed to Lindsay. Adding confusion to the mix, the name Deborah was still referred to later in the script, but scratched out for the new name.

As we previously reported, Lohan is suing the company for $100 million, insisting they modeled the baby after her. Ovadia insists that because of her stardom, Lohan now has single-name recognition among the general public.

Lohan believes that under New York state law, E*Trade was supposed to ask for her approval before using the name. They want the TV spot off the air and want $50 million in exemplary damages and another $50 million in compensatory damages.

[From PopEater]

Ugh. This lawyer sounds as bad as Lindsay, doesn’t she?

Lindsay in Paris on March 9 & 11, 2010. Credit: ANG/Fame Pictures.

Gwen Stefani‘s Technicolor InStyle cover. [CoverAwards]
Kristen Stewart wants to bite her lip on Saturday Night Live. [Evil Beet]
Heidi Montag fired her husband, hired a psychic. Good call! [Lightly Salted]
Quentin Tarantino will voice Brainy Smurf?!? [Agent Bedhead]
My second-favorite Fiennes boy had a baby! [Celebrity Baby Scoop]
F-ck, I love Bossip: “Gabrielle Union has been hitting the scene extra hard ever since she switched her wig.” [Bossip]
Why ‘The Green Zone‘ isn‘t ‘Jason Bourne in Iraq‘. [Moviefone]
Israeli nationalists want to force Bar Refaeli to dump her goy. [LimeLife]
Jason Castro is freaking me out. [PopBytes]
Oh, Britney. You crazy budget-weaved bitch. [I Don’t Like You In That Way]
Julie Bowen covered up her “dragon belly”. [The Superficial]
Jason “My Favorite” Bateman might work with Ryan Reynolds. [Crazy Days and Nights]
Sean Penn is a little bitch who can‘t take what he dishes out. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]
Damn, Jason Lewis looks hot in these photos. [Pop Sugar]
Kate Gosselin‘s kids are depressed. Yeah, I would be too. [ICYDK]

How the hell did I miss this? Reports are now running rampant that Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy have split, after dating for a very long, pear-assed year. Apparently this gossip has been circulating quietly most of the day, and all sources seem to be using this piece from Extra. Now, Extra is not even close to being a reliable source in the vein of People Magazine or something. But they make an interesting case:

Rumors have been circling for weeks that the “Ghost Whisperer” and her comic BF have called it quits — and “Extra” sources are saying it is true.

A source close to the pair says that Hewitt and Kennedy were supposed to attend an event together last week, but Kennedy arrived solo. He was also not present at Hewitt’s 31st birthday celebration last month. Lisa Stanley broke the news on KEarth 101, and “Extra” confirmed.

The two started dating at the beginning of 2009. No comment from their reps at this time.

[From Extra]

Eh. I’ve been wondering this whole time why Jennifer Love Hewitt would stay with a dude who calls her Pear-Ass on a semi-regular basis, but I have no idea if Love was the one to do the dumping. She’s usually the one to get dumped, isn’t she? I mean, that’s her deal, right? She starts dating someone strange, they get engaged after a few dates, they stay engaged forever and then the dude dumps her. That didn’t really happen (allegedly) here, because Jamie seemed to avoid engagement like the plague. Way to break the cycle, Jamie!

The National Enquirer has some insider information on what’s going on inside Tiger Woods’ troubled marriage. We heard earlier this week from Radar Online that Tiger and Elin were spotted kissing and hugging “right out in the open” in their neighborhood in Orlando, Florida. That sounded like spin from Tiger’s camp, and if the Enquirer is to be believed it might have been. Elin are Tiger are said to have had a big fight in a therapy session when she asked him to name all his mistresses and he flat out refused. A source claims that “At this point, Tiger’s marriage to Elin is nonexistent.”

During a therapy session at a private home, Tiger exploded at 30-year-old Elin’s demand that he name every one of his mistresses, insiders say.

“Elin said Tiger’s public apology wasn’t good enough,” a close source told The Enquirer. “She demanded that he name each woman he had sex with, and apologize for them, one by one. Tiger blew up. He said, ‘I’m not taking this anymore! I’ve been humbled enough. No More!’

“He’s been listening to his friends Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley, who are telling him to stop apologizing and get back to golf. Jordan told him, ‘It’s time to cut your losses and get back to taking care of YOU.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, March 22, 2010]

Tiger and Elin then hired a “full-time outpatient therapist” so that Tiger could receive treatment at home. The source also reports that he “agreed to return to [rehab] in Mississippi or to a rehab center in Arizona for additional therapy when his schedule permits.” It sounds like Tiger’s sense of entitlement is kicking in again.

Meanwhile, right before his public apology, Tiger flipped out because Elin refused to be there as a show of support. He’s said to have freaked out, yelled, cursed, and threatened to cancel it right before it was scheduled to air. His handlers calmed him down and convinced him to go on:

Prior to his blowup with Elin in Arizona, The Enquirer has learned that the golfer “went bonkers - yelling and cursing” moments before his 13-minute televised public apology on Feb. 19. He was upset because his wife refused to attend…

Just before he went on the air, an insider said: “Tiger was ready to bolt, threatening to call off the whole thing.

“He was eventually calmed by his advisers. They edited the speech to delete references to Elin being present and added a sentence about Tiger’s mother, scripting the hug between them.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, March 22, 2010]

Why does this not surprise me? Radar has a new story that may shed light on Elin’s motivation to stay, or it may be more one-sided reporting based on what Tiger’s people want to put out there. While I was hoping it was lots of cash, they claim that her twin sister, Josefin, convinced her not to file divorce papers right away and just to wait it out. They go on to claim that Elin is about to move back in with Tiger. She’s sticking around for whatever reason, so while she may be putting the screws to the guy she probably still has feelings for him and is willing to give him a chance. They do have two children together.